When I’m 84 Lyrics by Beautiful South

(heaton/rotheray)
Queuing with the old folk
Theres and old man with a wicked smile
Not through smug politeness
Hes doing it in style

No savings book or flannel slacks
No pardon when I heard them ask
Just a vodaphone and a filofax

When Im 64
Ill dream on

They all bore the milkman
Stop him for hours at their front gate
He just sits and thinks
Ill make the bastard wait

No dribbling or incontinence
No longing for the old sixpence
Just smoking weed till age makes sense

When Im 74
Ill dream on

They all save for blackpool
Just for the cheap companionship
Meanwhile he counts pennies
For a different trip

No smoking pipes and drinking bitter
No eyeing up the baby sitter
Ill trip up kids and Ill drop my litter

When Im 84
Ill dream on
When Im 84
Ill dream on late
Ill dream on
And Ill whisper late

Youre in your nineties arthur
Be careful with your back
Exercise your muscles
Id rather jack
Id rather jack